The Wake N' Bacon is a device created by God, specifically for me. It uses a bunch of electronic stuff that I don't understand to cook bacon for your enjoyment at a pre-selected time. No braying alarm...just the tangy, salty joy of wafting bacon smell.
Created by Matty Sallin, Daniel Bartolini and Hsiao-huh Hsu, the Wake N' Bacon is the perfect gift for the spouse who you are passive-aggressively trying to kill, or any other sweat-pant wearing acquaintance who has given up on their life.
I could have read the article, but there were a bunch of words I didn't know in there, so I just walked away from the computer and fucked a sock for a while. If I had this alarm clock I could have planned for Mom's getting home from work a little better and saved myself some embarrassment. Oh well, it's not like she's never seen THAT before.
