Lamp Shines on Your Junk. Is Disgusting.

The Oral Sex Light couldn't be more accurately named. There's not a whole lot more to say about it really. I think if you need a light to see what your doing down there, maybe you need to re-examine your relationship.

What are you afraid will jump out at you? Spiders? Bats, like in the opening sequence to "Scooby Doo, Where Are You"? If you're that unsure of your lover's cleanliness, maybe it's time to move on.

One time, my mom this chick was telling me that cunnilingus is the truest expression of love. I woulda shone the light right in her eyes, like a cop, and told her to shut the fuck up and quit cryin' if I had this sucker on.